I Want More

Day 1 since I broke it off with George. But, you know what? I think I did do the right thing. I think Elizabeth was right in that my radar was probably on to something. I talked to Jenny for a long time last night and she also mentioned that it was the right decision after listening to me about the other stuff. The talking about himself, the not coming when he said he would and not even mentioning it. Those are the big things for me. He is a little selfish. Sweet and kind, and made me feel special, but so did Matt at first. Love bombing. It gets to me so easily. I am such a sucker for it. I remember that feeling I had after sex. And then on the way home, And then even the next day, barely any texting. So yeah, my radar was right. I want someone who love me slowly and truly. Not so fast. Not hot and cold. Who engages with me and is curious about me. Someone who asks me questions too. Who shows interest. This wasn't him. Next. The love bombing thing was real I think. But, this time I caught early. I felt a power dynamic. I felt myself wanting his texts, needing them. He moved fast. Maybe it's in my head, but it felt off. I think he means well. But, I he's not the right person for me. He can be kind, and a good person and not the right person. 

Dream of hotel pool — pools usually connect to emotions, relaxation, vulnerability, or social belonging. A hotel is temporary, transitional, not “home.” Together, it can point to being in a phase where you want emotional ease, acceptance, or entry into a certain experience or group, but feel you don’t naturally belong there yet.

Bingo,..

I'm grateful for...

- meeting George and learning from it

- Jenny and the long phone call yesterday

- Patty and Lorena

- My health physically, mentally, and emotionally 


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