Trust Yourself

I don't think my session today helped. She said some things that were triggering. That it's not just his energy, but my stuff too. That could I be possibly leaving relationships early so that they don't break up with me. 

A- im leaving relationships early so they don't break up with me

B- Regret, feeling bad about myself., feeling hopeless 

C- im staying in relationships that aren't for me for too long, not early 

Maybe I needed this to let my emotions out. I needed to feel. I needed to talk. I needed to hear that his energy was off even for her. That something was off for him to have been married three times. And it's ok that I had a part in this. I know that. It was both of us. Not all him, not all me. But, in the end my therapist was still worried. My friends were worried. He was married three times. He lent me money. He was drowning financially. I know I dodged a bullet. Anni, you don't need special healers to tell you this. Just stick with your therapist and you will be ok. You will get through this. You will feel like you again. You will find a man that is right for you. He just wasn't right for you. Period. Full stop. Now take care of yourself. Be sad about what you went through. Be kind to yourself. You didn't cause this. You were the empathetic girl with father wounds. You now will be yourself in a relationship. No more pretending, no more walking on egg shells. No more doing what it takes to feel loved. No more trying to find a solution to all of this. Just trust yourself. 

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